Originally, when Joshua and I split earlier this year, we foolishly agreed to spend holidays together with our children (and if there happened to be significants joining, so be it). The holidays are still about the kids. As far as we were concerned, we were still a family. That was then.
Thanksgiving is a month away. I asked the kids what they wanted. I asked Joshua what he wanted. He wanted me to have them for half the day, then they would venture to his place for the evening. The kids were neutral. Having been the child of divorce, I always HATED splitting holidays. So I suggested to my son, that since his father only had Thanksgiving Day off, and I had the entire weekend off, they should spend the day with their dad and his girlfriend, and I would have a lovely dinner party for them on Saturday. That way, they don’t have to feel the pull of either parent, and we each get an entire day to chill with the kids. Mind you, M & M are 17 and 19. We aren’t talking babies here.
My son thought that was a good idea. The plan was set into place. And then it hit me…my first holiday EVER without my kids. WTF was I thinking??? Oh yeah, putting their happiness and comfort over my own. The 5 year old inside me is screaming, “Mine mine mine”, but the grown up is also saying it’s what’s best for the kids. So what to do with myself for Thanksgiving? I am not close with most family members and if we ever did celebrate together, it was at my house. My holiday plans are still formulating in my brain, but whatever happens, I am good with the decision I made.